Yoshi’s Noteboard 2.0
Write About NowArchive for Rants
Missed
Frustration... "My Greek is bad."
1. Was fleeced today in Greek exam. I know I could have done better, but got bogged down with locating the meanings and then realised I did not have enough time for my final section. *sobs* Just when I was starting to understand things…
2. Earth hour: Why turn off lights when you can turn off air-conditioners? I’m still skimping plastic bags, paper and unnecessary trips to the washing machine.
3. STM condition: It has been raining a bit recently. Everyone is overcome with work: some even missing chapel to sleep, or were too sick to get out of bed, or just plain ’studious’. Missing chapel to study?
4. UMNO elections: KJ and Sharizat are in. I’ve heard rumours that this season marks the beginning of a dark age for non-Muslims in the country. Hmmm…
5. Working on an assignment to be handed up tomorrow. Studying the lives of Martin Luther King, Sunday Adelaja and Mother Teresa, but I lament my slow progress. To all the studious students out there, all z best and keep up the slogging. One day, all of this will be worth the while. Just don’t return everything to your teacher.
On love and marriage
Being anal and/or constipated can sometimes describe a relationship. Don't ask me how.
One of the greatest things that annoy me about people who just get together is the fact that they want everyone else who is single to be like them, or to feel their joy. I think its quite nice and kind but I guess I’m still a bit too overly touchy about statements like, “don’t wait too long ya,” and “see what a relationship can do for you?” I know I’m not strong enough to deflect everything in a nice and courteous manner, but so far I’ve been surviving.
All the facts (except one, which I will list below) show to me that a relationship only means trouble. First, you get emotional instability. Second, you have to spend spend spend unnecessarily, just so that the other can return ‘love’ (time is also a commodity) and third, there is no guarantee that all this hassle will work out, and it may not be your fault at all! So, what is the whole point of having to get together? (don’t get me wrong, I don’t believe in the whole ‘casual dating’ or ‘casual relationships’ thing either, which is much worse than even getting into one)
However, the only thing that keeps my mind open towards developing a long term relationship in view of marriage is the possibility of character building. I know my pride needs alot of humbling, and I also know (for a fact) that marriage is one of the best crucibles for something as deep and far-reaching as this. It would teach me how to accomodate, be more patient (both with her and myself) and to learn how to be more sensitive, qualities which are good and necessary that I believe will help me in understanding others better. “What about love?” someone asked. For now, I think love is a choice. (and most of my choices have been denied. Blame it on my lack of sensitivity to the other’s needs/situation)
And so, even as I sit here and refuse to budge at all the ‘well-meaning recommendations’ of my friends, I pray that God will grant me the patience and serenity to wait for the right time. Because I believe that is the first place to learn about love.
CNY Apathy
Sometimes in the milieu of meaninglessness, a shrink is called for...
I’ve been having a nice and sombre little Chinese New Year this year. Like Christmas and New Year’s Day, where I spent a large portion of my time indoors (the happies), this CNY was spent with friends and family, traversing stops to collect more ang pows and renewing the bonds of friendship that should never be broken.
Through such a brief excursis, I have learnt that I am still a recluse at heart, an introvert that has learnt how to fit in to a noise-needing crowd, and being able to more adequately decrease my daily output of words to preserve sanity, both internally and externally. It has been quite fruitful so far.
School starts on Thursday, and then I travel down to Kluang again to begin lectures to the YF on Romans, which I am eagerly looking forward to. (how do you explain the concept of justification to 13 year olds?) Will see how they take it all in. I’ve got tonnes of preparation work (not including promises of forthcoming work, and mountains of wonderful books to read) and here I am using the MacBook Pro to lighten up.
Anyway, as an aside, here is a cute little quote I came across that I would like include as a lament to some ‘intellectual’ people I know:
“If the intelligentsia want to make a contribution to society, they must first understand what kind of society they live in. By society, of course, I do not mean the high society of snobs and socialites, but of people at grass-root level: how they live, how they work, what they do in their leisure time, what they think of the world, their hopes, their fears and aspirations… because the intelligentsia are puzzled over the nature of the society they live in, such views as they express from time to time relate to abstract principles in “vacuo”. Goh Keng Swee, 1967.
